| 1 | Paris Hilton... Vacancy. |
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| 2 | God created man before woman... but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece. |
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| 3 | Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone. |
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| 4 | If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, why isn't anything in the store is free yet? |
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| 5 | I ate a man's brain because he said I was stupider then him, and you know what, now I feel smarter. Isn't that neat? |
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| 6 | Never get into an argument with a schizophrenic person and say, "Just who do you think you are?" |
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| 7 | Department of Redundancy Department |
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| 8 | The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
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| 9 | What if the Hokey Pokey is really what it's all about? |
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| 10 | If Joe was such a hot-shot carpenter, why couldn't he whip up a groovy little cradle for Baby J.? |
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| 11 | I once put instant coffee in a microwave and went back in time. |
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| 12 | Oh Lord, give me patience, and GIVE IT TO ME NOW! |
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| 13 | My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant. |
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| 14 | Hermits have no peer pressure |
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| 15 | If you want to be a leader with a large following, just obey the speed limit on a winding, two-lane road. |
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| 16 | I'm not saying she's ugly, but if she was cast as Lady Godiva, the horse would steal the show. |
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| 17 | The only thing worse than an ignorant man is an ignorant man with a bible. |
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| 18 | 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. |
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| 19 | An apology is a good way to have the last word. |
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| 20 | Clones are people two. |
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