| 1 | Two eyebrows are better than one. |
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| 2 | Love doesn't really make the world go round, but it makes the ride worthwhile. |
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| 3 | Never try to lick a glacier. |
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| 4 | Cannibals won't eat divorced women...they're very bitter. |
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| 5 | A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:"You can have mine." |
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| 6 | If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight? |
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| 7 | We buy things we don't need, with money we don't have, to impress people we don't know. |
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| 8 | I never really learned the difference between what is right or wrong. That's why I automatically assume that whatever I say MUST be right. |
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| 9 | If your name was homework, i'd be doing you on my desk right now.
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| 10 | It's not how you die that matters. It's who you take with you. |
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| 11 | Life without you would be like a broken pencil... Pointless. |
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| 12 | When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've broke up, I think it's time you kept your promise! |
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| 13 | I broke a leg one time ... spilt coffee all over. |
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| 14 | Trust in God, but tie your camel. (Arab proverb) |
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| 15 | A goal properly set is halfway reached. |
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| 16 | The gifts the gods gave me I use in battle or in bed. |
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| 17 | A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. |
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| 18 | Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now. |
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| 19 | I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. |
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| 20 | It's not the bullet that kills you, it's the hole. |
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