| 1 | Failure is the only opportunity to begin more intelligently. |
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| 2 | In America any boy may become President and I suppose it's just one of the risks he takes.
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| 3 | I have discovered the whole problem with the National Debt. Most of us work 5 days a week, and the government spends 7. |
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| 4 | It's a fine night to have an evening. |
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| 5 | Don't judge a book by its movie. |
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| 6 | This website may not be idiot proof, but at least it's dimwit resistant. |
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| 7 | Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time. |
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| 8 | There's nothing wrong with you that changing everything about yourself wouldn't cure. |
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| 9 | The way to a man's heart is to saw his breastplate open. |
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| 10 | My wife says my sex drive has taken up walking. |
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| 11 | Engineer: a person who knows a great deal about very little and who goes along knowing more and more about less and less, until finally he knows practically everything about nothing. |
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| 12 | Success always occurs in private and failure in full view. |
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| 13 | The only thing you have to do is breathe; Everything else is just optional. |
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| 14 | If God is within, I hope he likes enchiladas!
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| 15 | Saw It... Wanted It... Had A Fit... Got It! |
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| 16 | If you do something you'll regret in the morning, SLEEP TILL NOON! |
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| 17 | No doubt exists that all women are crazy. It's just a question of degree. |
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| 18 | When you are arguing with an idiot, make sure the other person isn't doing the same thing. |
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| 19 | I will not encourage others to fly. |
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| 20 | If you want to get along, go along. |
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